Tuesday, February 8, 2011

where honesty got me

I made the mistake of telling the doctor what all I'm irrigating my nose with, and my antibiotics.  He told me that to continue to receive treatment I had to comply with their treatment plan.
The thing is, their treatment plan seemed to be letting me get sick as hell again and then very gently poking at my infection with a light, refreshing application of topical antibiotics...the thing is, of course, that when the infection's raging my sinuses get swollen enough that I can't get them to drain. 
 If stuff can't get out when I stick a dental irrigator up there-essentially pressure-washing my sinuses...how on earth do they think the topical antibiotics are going to get in???
Basically, whenever I report symptoms, if they can't see what I'm talking about when they're scoping my nose...they completely discount it.
So I have to present with flagrant symptoms in order to get treatment. This also implies that they will discontinue treatment before I'm actually completely clear of infection.
 The fact that what I'm doing has reduced the discolored crusty stuff by about 90%-well, they again do not believe me because they don't see the crusting.
 Because I can't stand to have that stuff in my nose...I irrigate it out.
At this point the county ENT people definitely think I'm a hypochondriac.  I heard the word "psych" when they were discussing me.  This is why I need to take my wife with me from now on when I go.
The thing is, I don't want to be made *just well enough* that they can't see infection when they shove a 'scope up my nose. Because they cannot see the sphenoid sinus, they cannot see the frontal sinus...and that's where any remaining yellow crud/green crud/brown crud seems to be coming from.
I really should have brought them some more discolored snot in a jar. Next time I absolutely will.
I want to have no infection present...meaning I see no discharge that's green, or yellow,or whatever other interesting color my nose can make, when I irrigate.
White or clear postnasal discharge is the color it's supposed to be, right?
I think I am going to have to go pay to talk to my ex-allergist about my treatment, because...these people are not listening to me.  Not at all.
I want a second opinion and I'm likely going to have to pay about $200-300 for it.
So much for communication.  I'm furious and tearing up at the same time just thinking about this.
I have three choices: quit going entirely-meaning my condition has no monitoring at all, comply with them and get sicker, or lie.
If I quit going entirely, I'm wasting a probably-needed, useful resource.  If I comply with them-I get sick again. 
I've already seen that to be the case...and found that when I presented with flagrant symptoms, they still didn't give me oral steroids or antibiotics. 
Which is the freaking gold standard from what I can tell from ENT doctor's sites about this.
Lying seems to be the most advantageous thing to do in this bag of dicks.
I am going to have to find a way to afford my old allergy doc's advice. 
I really need him...to at least x-ray my head and tell me when I can stop taking antibiotics, and possibly to tell me if I'm being insane or not.

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